so we'd spread love like violence; ♥
♥ rai·son d'ê·tre (rā'zōn dět'rə,) {존재 이유}

n. pl.reason or justification for being or existence


naomi jung
서여정, 三浦 なおみ
29 june 1992
ngee ann poly mass communications
Rorsharch ink blot
J Tune Entertainment

& ooooh, Rain 비 = ♥


Heart of God Church ♥ b41

/more about me


나의 남편!


정지훈/Rain/Jihoon - the husband.

Faith/Spaz - the best friend.

Prisia/Siao - the other best friend.

Cheryl - Cooking mama

Joyce - Korean fanatic.

Brother (wenjun) - who has 10000000 brains

Hyun - Mr Smart-ass Korean.

Chew - Dear Leader.


Ajumma (아줌마) : Auntie

Ajusshi (아저씨) : Uncle

Chagiya/Yeobo (자기야/여보): Darling/Honey

Namja Chingu/Namchin (남자친구/남친) : boyfriend

Yeoja Chingu/Yeochin (여친/여자친구) : girlfriend

Hyung (형) : Older brother (for males)

Oppa (오빠) : Older brother, also can be used as "boyfriend" in a steady relationship (for females)

Nuna (누나) : Older sister (for males)

Onni (언니) : Older sister (for females)

Ssulung (썰렁) : "so cheesy/cold/lame" for cold jokes

Selca (셀카) : camwhore/self camera

Wang Ja (왕자) : 6 pack/washboard abs



♥ Heart Of God Church
♥ B and C Zone!
♥ donghaeng; Lord and Me
♥ Moi-même-Moitié
♥ amelia
♥ andrew lau!
♥ andrina
♥ anqi
♥ bellrarie!
♥ boxue!
♥ candy!
♥ cassandra!
♥ chew!
♥ clara!
♥ dajie
♥ darren!
♥ daryl!
♥ debrah
♥ faith, best friend!
♥ fedora!
♥ gabrielle!
♥ hinwen
♥ ivan!
♥ jasmine
♥ jia en!
♥ jia jia!
♥ jiayang!
♥ jia yun
♥ joanne!
♥ joyce
♥ kenneth!
♥ le raine
♥ ling
♥ liyin
♥ lucinda!
♥ marissa
♥ nadine!
♥ nelson!
♥ pearlyn
♥ peggy
♥ pei fen!
♥ pei jun
♥ reuben
♥ ruoen!
♥ ryan new!
♥ samantha!
♥ samantha whang
♥ sion; mr kimchi!
♥ shermaine!
♥ shihua
♥ shijin
♥ shizhe
♥ shumin
♥ shu xian/joe
♥ sofiana
♥ sophia
♥ sushian!
♥ sylvia!
♥ thea
♥ ting wei!
♥ trisha
♥ wanwen
♥ wei lai
♥ wendy
♥ winsome
♥ yi jing!
♥ yu xuan
♥ zhiyi!


♥ Abingdon Boys School
♥ Gackt
♥ Kenichi Matsuyama @ Horipro
♥ L'arc~En~Ciel
♥ Malice Mizer
♥ Namie Amuro
♥ S.K.I.N

♥ Big Bang
♥ DBSK Offical Site
♥ Epik High
♥ Rain's Company - J Tune Entertainment
♥ Rain's Company - J Tune Creative
♥ Rain's Offical Site
♥ Se7en
♥ Tablo
♥ Yiruma

♥ Gackt Dears
♥ Gackt Syndrome
♥ Rain Singapore
♥ Rain Union
♥ Sexy Bi


Blogs I read:

♥ Feet Man Seoul
♥ Joss Sticks
♥ K-popped!
♥ Lakeside Girl
♥ Mr Brown
♥ Mr Miyagi
♥ Mr Wang Says So
♥ PopSeoul!
♥ The Sartorialist
♥ Sibeh Sian
♥ Singaporean Mind
♥ Son of Singapore



11월 2005 12월 2005 1월 2006 2월 2006 3월 2006 4월 2006 5월 2006 6월 2006 7월 2006 8월 2006 9월 2006 10월 2006 11월 2006 12월 2006 1월 2007 2월 2007 3월 2007 4월 2007 5월 2007 6월 2007 7월 2007 8월 2007 9월 2007 10월 2007 11월 2007 12월 2007 1월 2008 2월 2008 3월 2008 4월 2008 5월 2008 6월 2008 7월 2008 8월 2008 9월 2008 10월 2008 11월 2008 12월 2008


Layout: vehemency

토요일, 3월 31, 2007, 7:55 오후

` 554; - goong S!

No matter whoever says that Goong S is trying to copy Goong 1 or whatever, I must say that Goong S is ROCKIN'. (:

I have infected Girlfriend with Goong S (:
And Se7en <3 <3 <3
Sekshiiiiii. Yummyyyyy. :D
Sorry Fedora O^.^O
And a snippet, just for fun, of Goong 1

Chaegyung, Lee Shin and Child xD
it's something we crazy people do at soompi sometimes :D

라벨: ,

10:57 오전

` 553; -

take me to the secret place
where I could only see Your face;

This week has been quite sucky & eventful. Oxymoronic.

The Beijing trip thingy, I'm paired up with Sophia. (: However, she'd most probably go with Xiuli they all, so I'm stuck with my iPod. The 1E3 people are stuck somewhere in other groups, and I'm this odd one in.

AND. For SYF I'm out. Because Lulu kicked Jolyn out, I have no partner, and then she kicked ME out. Anyway then I have more time for piano and CHURCH <3
- and I could tear tickets at this year's Arts Fiesta :D

Went with Girlfriend, Shihui and Renyi to AMK yesterday to buy YARN for Girlfriend to knit something. Lugged my thick-as-hell Chemistry and Biology books + stupid erhu along. ): But we scoffed down food yesterday (: Love you girls soooooo much <3

Alvaro taught us CO yesterday. <3 Dominic is freaking pro. He can do tremolo on the erhu when I can do some pathetic steps. ): GAH DOMINIC. You'll find your erhu in flames :D

Miss church, and it stuns me how I really long for my B2. Looking forward to every Sunday and friday and those days where I could hang out with Fedora, Calamari and Sly. (:

(Heard from the grapevine that Calamari is doing Daniel Fast; jiayou Darren! (:)

it somehow amazes me that
how I fall from the cliff
Your hand sweeps me away from death

And Your hands are so strong
they could hold up the heavens
yet they're so gentle
You could wipe my tears away

수요일, 3월 28, 2007, 9:04 오후

` 552; -

and I've fallen from grace
for all I need is to see your face

I just don't like what I see & feel now. Confused whirlpool of emotions going up & down & topsy-turvy. Jumping into conclusions; what if? & what if? I don't know how I'd handle it if I face the truth. Consequently, I don't care how ___ I may be but well, it just comes. Come what may.

This week has been pretty sucky for me, & I think this week must be one of the worst times in my life. I have done more reflecting in these three days than in my lifetime. What if? Why? What happened?

Maybe it's just because I'm paranoid & insecure but hello, aren't we all. Why when people throw a fuss & do things their way, other people relent & give in? But when I just say something wrong, everybody take that and blow it up.

Personal insecurities, I reckon.

I try and try to give in to people, but they just take advantage of it and start to demand something. & when I say no, they start to actually hate me and stuffs.

Maybe I must just learn how to say no.

I have some people I need to depend on in my life. I wish I could just go to Labrador, sit on the beach & talk to someone about how I actually feel and that he/she will understand. But maybe I am feeling more than I could ever say, for now.

I used to talk to someone, & that person could just be there for me and help me through everything I do. We used to talk until late in the night on the phone, & just discuss about anything and everything. And now... we just.

I really treasure that person a lot, & now I'm still reeling from the hurt that came; I just did not see it coming.

The harder you try to come out of a rut, the deeper you'll sink in.


화요일, 3월 27, 2007, 3:36 오후

` 541; - life's a bitch.

Move On; - Rain

When are you going to stop crying
As you wait for someone who isn’t going to come,
closing your heart firmly
Why won’t you see me
I’m waiting for you, who is waiting for him

Move on move on
You should just stop, that person isn’t coming
Open up my heart now

Let me be the one to hold you tight
Be the one you wait for every night
I’ll take that person’s seat now,
I’ll do it I will always be right by your side
I won’t leave you like that person did

My heart that’s seeing you like this
Is hurting the same way yours is because of that person
My gaze that is watching you
Is the same as your gaze that looks at the seat that person left


Turn around and look at me now, give me a chance too
The scar that person left I’ll take it upon myself,
making up for it forever by your side
So give me a chance


Love this song <3

Didn't get the dep head post, and neither did Cheri.
Don't know why, and I DON'T WANT TO CARE :D

Thanks Yuxuan, Emily, Tjiayinggggg, Shane and Vanessa for saying something that made life regret about shagging me like that ;D

What YOU did to ME I did to YOU (:

At least I could spend more time with B2, Fusion and hoGc.
Oh how I miss churchhh ):

Miss Khong insulted my poor dear husband today. ):
Said his body is good but she can live without his head.


Uthara agrees with her.

"The body is the one doing all the work man. Not the lips ;D"
"Ew. I'd rather see the face. Imagine walking with your headless husband."
"I could just kiss his abs :D"
"I'd like all of him, thankyouverymuch." *scrambles outta conversation*

월요일, 3월 26, 2007, 5:37 오후

` 550; - hoGc
"The boys got teapot, the girls got something else." - Miss Chia, during Sexuality Education
I miss church.

Everytime I go home with Tingwei after dinner with Bzone people on Sunday night, Tingwei would turn to me and say;

"I don't want to go to school, I miss church so much."

I agree with her. In church, I could act cute, let loose and hang wild with everybody practically doing the same thing. I could really be myself in church. And in school, where every single mistake you do is being frowned upon and exaggerated until everyone hates you for that ant you just accidentally stepped on this morning.

I miss B2. Fedora, Darren, Nelson, Hannah, Tingwei, Lucie, Eilen, Nan Chiau people, Pang Chew Theng and Lynn and others.

thanks Eric for the photos! (:
hoGc-ians, tonight, we dine in heaven!
NAOMI: "Pastors hope that we will marry each other right?"
FEDORA: "Possibly so la. :D"
NAOMI: "Then you can marry Darren! :DD"
FEDORA: -_____- "And who knows, you will end up with ROY :D"

Hope la Fedora, eh? ;D


Sizzling, as always, Mr Jeong :D

라벨: , ,

일요일, 3월 25, 2007, 10:43 오전

` 549; - Man Up

Man Up - Omarion feat. Rain

same ol' scenario
your girl sees me and she wanna know
why she's intrigued if she wanna go
cuz she likes it, she likes it
hey don't get mad at me
cuz I'm that dude you supposed to be
and she keep cutting her eyes at me
and you hate it, you hate it

control your girl lil' fella
look at how she's got you jealous
don't get mad at me playa
I can't help that your girl want it
let's just be men about this
there's no ring on no one's finger
all's fair in love and war
you know, you know

I know it's hard but
play your part boy
where your heart at?

before your girl be, be upon me
you don't want that

c'mon playa, man be a soldier fight for what you want
comin' on me
you need to man up

it's funny you don't have a clue
that I don't even care like you think I do
and I ain't even trippin' over her or you
and that's real talk, that's real talk, yeah
but here's some news for you
maybe I'll manage your problem dude
and I got her on lock man,
I thought you knew and that's gangsta,
that's gangsta, yeah

My girl straight lil' fella*
I ain't even the least bit jealous
and I'm not mad at you playa
she may look don't mean she want it
so I'm being cool about this if she want it, she can have it
all's fair in love and war
you know, you know


라벨: ,

토요일, 3월 24, 2007, 11:59 오후

` 548; -

Quote of the day:
" Are you blind, or are YOU blind?" - Nelson


Played pool with Darren, Nelson and Fedora in church. Won Darren and Fedora. (:
Prayer meeting was great. Prayed for an hour without realising it, and normally I would doze off during these meetings =X


DARREN: "Your plasma tv is too complex for us mere mortals to understand, Naomi."
NELSON: "Ya lor."
NAOMI: *glares at Nelson*
NELSON: "It's okay, it's alright. God still loves me."

They're coming to my house to watch 300 after exams, YAY. <3

Lord I pray that hoGc will accelerate this year, as it is our VISION (:
New level, new devils. The devil will NEVER take our integration away~!
Rise up church for a holy meet! <3


금요일, 3월 23, 2007, 1:30 오후

` 547; -

can I tell that I still love you, tonight?

Love, One word. 4 letters. One indefinate meaning.


I'm so (not) missing you.


수요일, 3월 21, 2007, 9:05 오후

` 545; - hooga hooga ho ha.

Quote for the meantime:
"Fuck you, stranger." - Sherman

I am shortlisted for the Beijing trip.
Beijing + Girlfriend + sans parents = BLISS. (:

Music was the sex! anytime and anywhere; baby :D

Hinwen didn't come today, and Alastair scooted over to the seat beside me (: Alastair's Augustine's brother, from 2nd batch 4e5 of Hougang. Le Raine's ex. Smallllll world, ain't it.

NAOMI: *grabs phone*
ALASTAIR: *deletes messages*
NAOMI: "Why? Your girlfriend?"
ALASTAIR: "No, BOYFRIEND (:" *guffaws*

And then, he messed up my daily planner.

ALASTAIR: *takes baby photo* "You?"
NAOMI: "YA then who."
ALASTAIR: "Your hair so bushy! XD" *flings photo*
ALASTAIR: "Naomi can I look at your wallet?"
NAOMI: "Go ahead."
ALASTAIR: *grabs wallet* "Girls' wallets are so interesting! :D I've seen Peggy's, yours more interesting!" *staring at Rain's photo-card*

And he was so engrossed in my wallet to the extent that he did not realise that Yinliang was hanging his sock next to his face X_X

And moments later...

ALASTAIR: "Naomi, do you have a boyfriend?"
NAOMI: "Not yet, why?" O.o
ALASTAIR: "Very hard to believe! Ahyo, you so pretty who will reject you?"
NAOMI: "Hellooo. Concentrate on studies first okay."
ALASTAIR: "Okayokay. Next time I will surely chase you one."


And this is the goondu who insulted my accent in Tamil.

The goblock on the right ;D
And our quote?



There was this CUTE music teacher from Ang Mo Kio Sec who came to CHIJ St Nicks to advertise for us to go to his school. Wabiang, only the Presbytarian High and Deyi and Mayflower were allowed to transfer there.

He had this mustache, a la male models, and he was wearing this sexy shirt *hypervendilates* and his accent was so *swoon*.

Peggy was practically fawning over him. Sihui was gesturing and I was OMG-ing.
Alastair, obviously jealous, quipped "Yeah, his face is handsome and his accent sexy, but his body is not good."

And, a quote from Peggy,
"Why can't Mr Cher be that hot male teacher?"



Thank you for showing me insights and becoming my philosophy teacher for the past 2 years (: If it wasn't for you I'd be a person who does not think deeply, and I'll still be some wondering soul with no sense of direction. I'm grateful for the support and stuff you've given me, and,

你有你的 YOUNG!


라벨: , , ,

화요일, 3월 20, 2007, 11:25 오후

` 545; - this ain't a scene, it's an arms race

Tingwei has 7 husbands. I have 5.
Nevermind, I'll CATCH UP SOON. (:

Sometimes that Friend turns out to be your worst enemy, al la Paris + Nicole. Frenemies. ):
Gained an insight on life. :D Ironic, ain't it.


New songs to groove along during homework time :D

What's with the baa-baa on the cover, I wonder.

Xiao Hui spurted amylase, boiled, mind you, onto my arm during SPA Biology. By accident. But it's as gross as getting someone spit his/her boiling spit on you *shudders*


Got shortlisted for Beijing trip today, yummmmmy.

Beijing + Girlfriend = BLISS, shopping, sans parents.

More later.

월요일, 3월 19, 2007, 9:25 오후

` 544; - I'm a Cyborg but that's Okay!

"Marriages are like cars. You must test drive a car before you bring it home right? If you don't test it, you drive home a car and find out that it rusty in the engine." - Renie


Kamsahaminda Fedora, Darren and Shermaine!

I can't believe I sneaked into a NC-16 movie and got out unscathed =X


Some memorable quotes:

Young-goon; - Lim Soo-jung
Ilsoon; - Rain

"Take back your pingpong ball. My butt becomes itchy every time I play using it." - Ilsoon

"Thursday is missing! Monday's are here, but where are the Thursday undies?" - Young-goon

"I am cyborg, but psycho!"

"Coffee... Black." - Ilsoon

"The floresecent lights are not friendly at all, maybe the ones in the wards are friendlier." - Young-goon

"Silent Rice, Holy Rice

All is calm, all is rice

Round yon virgin, mother and child

Eating noodles, so tender and mild" - Young-goon

"They say I am anti-social, schizoprenic, under depression, multiple personality disorder... and mild dementia." - Ilsoon

AHHHHAHAHA. I felt so retarded watching the show. But the kissing scene was 30 seconds, instead of 10 seconds, and it seemed like eternity. ):

Have to leave now, have to brace myselffor Mama's Lecture Number One; Study and Study Hard.

bye, all.

토요일, 3월 17, 2007, 12:43 오전

` 543; -

"naturally he won't accept."

"yeah I know."

"and for one thing"


"he wont fall for u, end of story."

It's sad how things turn out sometimes.

Zane says:

-On Marriage:
"that marriage will NEVER 35, you'll end up in a divorce."
"that a girl shouldnt be married at the age of 23."
"it'd mean he's 27."
"if he completes his uni at 22, goes NS for 2 years,
comes out 24, works for a year 25, works util 27, barely affords a car, married."

-On rich guys:
"do u think u will be picked by a rich guy? no."
"a rich guy has many candidates, he can toy with all sort of women and stuff."

-On liking girls
"cuz if i like a girl and i wan her to know how i feel, i'll just give obvious hints."
"and when she asks u like me ah or something, i wont hesitate to say yes."

Oh goodness, he's super smart. And he's in my class. (:

라벨: ,

금요일, 3월 16, 2007, 9:47 오후

` 542; - mmhmm.

Prefect bonding was fun, if not cool. Only a minor hiccups but funfunFUN (:
Eddin ar Eddin. Go and scold me for what. ): You're making me superrrr sad.

While we're playing squeeze and stretch, XH fell on my arm /while I was grabbing Wayne/. I became the medic instead :D

The BBQ. Bryan, the considerate, went and lined the BBQ "pit" with the Obiturary page of Straits Times and started to light it. How very considerate. God bless their souls.

And, being the considerate person that he was, he started to sing "You're Pitiful" out loud, causing the fire to flicker and die. (:

He can make his mark as a cabaret singer, eh, Bryan? ;D

I smelt of charcoal after the whole BBQ was done.

Thanks mucho mucho to WAYNE for sending me home (:


I need to speak.
I feel that you're not actually treating me as a good friend.
You suggested something that became one of the worst decisions I had ever made in my life.
You used me. You only see me as the "going home" friend, the "movie buff", the "compromising", the RAIN IDIOT", the "little rich girl", the "person who I can make use of".

Whenever I try to suggest something, you cut me off immediately.
And you never invite me on outings with people. Only if I asked if I could be invited.
Oh, and you said, "we'll never leave you out." BULL.
You guys just use me. As a "friend".

When it comes to anything I say, you made my mood go down like a roller-coaster deathdrop. For example, I say, "I love Biology." and you retort by, "Oh, Biology is the shittiest subject that I have ever studied. It sucks to the core."
Yeah, and when other people say, "I love Math." Even though if you hated math, you'll say, "Oh, Math is LOVE."

And, a final word, It's YOU who do not bother making friends with people, not ME. Don't complain why I do not introduce people to you. YOU take the initiative, not ME.

As ling!'s friend Mahdi says, "I do not like to talk to irritating idiots."

라벨: ,

목요일, 3월 15, 2007, 2:05 오후

` 541 ; - aishite mo ii kai?

Music [|Vanilla; Unplugged Version - Gackt|]

Listening to Gackt again ;D Much much thanks goes to Calamari for intro-ing Gackt the handsome to me (:
OMG. Gackt's the best (: bestbestbest I say! :D

Rotting at home with practically a lot of homework to do but I can't be bothered :D

Andmybutthurtsbecausewehad3hoursofdancenon-stop. ): My poor butt.

AndANDand, I had this rly creepy dream last night that stuck in my head. Concerning B2. Won't elaborate but it freaked me out. *grabs Jer*

Sorry Girlfriend for not going out with you ytd ): I rly wanna go Holland V with you lurh, but no time. Miane, gomen. I swear I'll grab you to go Holland V with me next week or so.

Debs you had better teach me how to use photoshop. I have absloutely no idea how to operate this software after Pabo cracked the code for me. ): And Pabo claims that he is teh n00b in Photoshop. l33t indeed.

1) Mom bought a pathetic skirt after driving 2 hours up /or smth/ to JB. ):
2) Cutie Pie bought me a box of Dunkin' Donuts in JB for me ;D Naomi is happy (:
3) Lunched with Jason and CB, went to study. The hormone-raged guys were talking about marriage, sex and stuff right out loud in the library & I was sitting next to CB pretending to be asleep >:(
4) Smelly dropped my phone.

Goodafterrrrrnooon, leaving for CG nw. Will crap and post l8r. (:


수요일, 3월 14, 2007, 3:37 오후

` 540 ; - srsly.

Seriously, when someone has a crush on a guy, and she tells you because she trusts you. You have NO RIGHT to tell it to the whole group, and have everyone make fun of her. And furthurmore, she's your JUNIOR, dammit.

Doesn't mean she's a junior, gullible and all gives you every reason to poke fun at her. You all call her fugly. Look at yourselves. Aren't you no better? if you're insulting someone, you're insulting her parents. They created her with the assistance of God, and you're indirectly mocking God as well.

If that's not enough, you still have the audacity to say that she sucked someone's male anatomy. And you placed it on your MSN nick. It's embarassing, not only for her, but for the other guy as well. You all are already 14, 15? You should know better than to do these childish acts. It's incorrigible and disgusting.

People have feelings, unlike you all. The worst thing you can do to a person is to cruch their dreams and their dignity, and that is exactly what you guys are doing to her. Call yourselves leaders. I don't think so.

Can you carry yourselves with some self-respect and take people's feelings into consideration?
Put yourselves in her shoes.

She's confused, and hurt now because you have done to her what you had done to me before.


3:11 오후

` 539 ; - au revoir

Au Revoir; Farewell - Malice Mizer

itsumo futari bun no hibiku ashigoto ga tsuzuiteta michi de
kare-hatete shimatta gairojutachi ga
ookiku natta hohaba o kitsukaseta

Along the street that had always echoed with our footsteps
The withered trees fading away down the road
The percieved distance between our steps increase

kata ni sure chigau chiisana ochiba ga mata sora ni modotte
sonna fuki-sasabu kaze sae mo ima wa naze ka itoshikute
sotto hohouende ita

The small falling leaves passing by my shoulders once more returned to the sky
And then I somehow loved even the violent wind
Gently I was smiling

madobe ni motareru minareta sugata ga
kageru hizashi ni utsushi-dasarete kieru
afureru omoi ni tsubuyaita kotoba wa
"semete yume ga sameru made"

Your familiar form leaning on the windowsill
Flickers among the hazy sunlight and disappears
A whispered phrase in my crowded memories says
"If only until I awake from this dream..."


anata o dakishime nemuritai
yasashii kioku ni kawaratta ima de sae mo
kono ude de dakishime nemuritai
deatta koro no futari no you ni

Just a while more
I want to fall asleep holding you
Even if only in this time changed by gentle memories
I want to fall asleep with you in my arms
Like we were when we first met

madobe ni motarete zawameku
sotto tsubuyaku onaji kotoba o mou ichido...
ano toki no sugata ga mienaku natte mo
semete yume no naka dake wa

You lean against the windowsill and it rustles
And I hear the softly murmered phrase once more...
Even though I can't see your form like then
At least amidst this dream


anata o dakishime nemuritai
kono ude de dakishime nemuritai

I want to fall asleep holding you
I want to fall asleep with you in my arms


The lyrics somehow amazes me.
How something so abstract and significant can be woven into words
And rhyme with the music, like how Mana and Gackt had done. (:

Malice Mizer, even though they have disbanded, will still be my no. 1 Visual Kei band <3

라벨: ,

화요일, 3월 13, 2007, 9:11 오전

` 538; -

Been busy, as of late.

Church stuff and things.
Ignite Conference 2007 was AWESOME.

I live with the hope that I can build hoGc Korea with a big bang, and it'll be as big as Pastor Cho Yonggi's church!

to You I sing;


일요일, 3월 11, 2007, 12:19 오후

` 537 ; -

조금씩 지쳐가지 너무나 익숙한 아픔에
쓰러지라고 나의 어깨를 짓누르면서
세상은 말을 하지 나는 꿈을 꿔서는 안된다고
아무런 희망도 너와의 사랑도 내겐 허락되지 않은 거라고

Slowly this pain makes me weary
I straighten my back, trying not to collapse
The world tells me I shouldn’t dream
I don’t be given any hope or love from you


I'm just tired.
It's hard.
Having a jaksarang. One sided. Unrequited.


토요일, 3월 10, 2007, 12:22 오후

`536; -

"It sucks to like someone you could never, ever, get." - Renie

Went J8 with Uthara, hoping i could get to see Hyun Jun. But we didn't.
Well, whatever.

Thanks Amanda, Uthara and Jia Ling for the encouragement and the shoulders (:


My own mood surprises me sometimes.

At home, I rarely even speak. Even if I want to, I can't.

You see, I wasn't supposed to be in this world at all. I was what they labeled me, "an accident."
My parents didn't even want children at all. Even though other people called me a miracle (because my dad's condition), I see myself as a fugly loser with heart + kidney problems.

I can't speak at home, as my father is one heck of a one-track mind. He only see things his way and he can't accept the harsh fact that people do not see things the way he does. My mom, on the other hand, is a stubborn person who likes me not to get into fights and possibly, be single forever and ever, amen.

Now I'm on an all-out war with them, all because it stemmed from an argument about why I came out of MEP class at CHIJ St Nicks late by 10 minutes.

My father, being the one -track idiot, says it's MY fault for disrupting the class, (which I did with Hinwen, and we got sent out, but this didn't affect the class at all.)

Please, we didn't even have sex at the water coolers or something. Gosh. It's al all-girls school, unless Remy and Alastair becomes lesbian or something.

Fine, I hate my parents, and my life.

hinwen, he's not mine, he's yours (:
Since he says he likes you, go back to him la bitch ;D
I'm cool with it.
Even if you don't stead with him, or you do, our friendship will remain the same, bestie.
For I love you more than you ever think I will, sexy (:

라벨: ,

금요일, 3월 09, 2007, 8:38 오후

` 535; -

Jaded. Tired. Confused.

Get your shine on, lovelies.

much love goes out to Girlfriend and Uthara. <3


수요일, 3월 07, 2007, 8:08 오후

` 534; - phantom; and love

Eat your heart out, lovelies.

Girlfriend and I are going to watch Phantom, nyah nyah nyahhhhhh. ;D
If my /future/ guy doesn't like watching musicals, to hell with him (:


I'm so touched by Girlfriend's post on that cockroach (if he truly is one.)
I've never gotten remarks about how pretty I am by anyone before, not in my life. I didn't know, -according to her- that I have a sense of humor -_-
For all I know, I've been labeled ugly, uncouth and loud.
Maybe I shall stop using expletives. =X


"Love hurts! Sometimes love sure hurts!" Many people sure express their difficulties, and heartaches of their past experiences.

"Maybe if we didn't love so much, it wouldn't be so hard." That's what many people feel too. Even though love brings pain & sorrow, what would life be without it? Empty? Like a nebula, devoid of anything?

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything at all & your heart will be wrung and possibly be broken." /how so true/. "If you want your heart to be unbroken, you must give it to NO ONE, not even DADA (an animal, I mean). Wrap it carefully around you, your hobbies and luxuries; avoid all entanglements, lock it up safe and sound."

If you think that way, to only place outside heaven where you can be perfectly safe from love is HELL.

To love is to take risks, to expose our hearts to more hurt. Sometimes it hurts! (NAH~ It ALWAYS does!)

Nothing costs as much as loving, except NOT loving.

"Love is patient and kind, does not envy,does not boast, it is also not self-seeking, not easily angered and it keeps no record of wrongs. It does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.


{1 Corinthians 13:4-8}


Sometimes I wish I could really feel how would it be like, to love and be loved in a realistic way. I know, I love God, but I just feel I don't love him enough. I want to feel how it is like for you to love someone, and that love to be returned back to you in the same way.

Let nature take its course (:

THANKS girlfriend and Manda for smses and talks and stuff (: saranghae mucho muchooo gals (:


5:08 오후

` 533; - my 7 main purposes in life

In life, I want to fufill 7 things.

1. To serve God the best I can.
2. To do all my friends and family proud of everything I do.
3. To be a famous and celebrated pianist and model.
4. Have a job that I actually enjoy.
5. Get married early in life and have 3 children. I hope to have a daughter that looks like me, and with a little good features from her father (:
6. Find someone who loves me for who I am, and not by facial appearance.
7. To change the world.


4:15 오후

` 532; - just that girl

"Why are all the guys you meet in your life jerks?" - Damien.


Ying Thong: "See? Everyone in my class knows you!"
Naomi: "I am not convinced."

-grabs Wee Kiat-

Ying Thong: "Wee Kiat, who is this?"
Wee Kiat: "Naomi right?"
Naomi: "-__________-"


I'm feeling really horrible right now.
Everything's strewn all over my table, science books, books and the like, and I'm cracking my head over a Physics question. With migrane. With head throbbing like crap.

Dad wants to move back to Pasir Panjang (near Vivo), which is like some godforsaken place where teenagers are practically banned. The area where the retro hang out.

Noooooooo. I want to stay in Serangoon. And laugh my head off. Even though Pasir Panjang may be near ACJC, but who gives.


I feel less Godly by the minute.
Stupid jerks.

라벨: ,

화요일, 3월 06, 2007, 10:02 오후

` 531; - defination of pretty

I am so fucking depressed.
And I am so screwed up.

Why does everyone notice my friends and not me, when we go for group outings.
Why do I end up the ugly duckling infront of a guy and not my friend.

And why does she say I'm pretty
when I am obviously not.

Person#1 got negative comments from Person#2 and #3 after going out with me.
Mostly made up off?

"Nah, pal, she's too ugly."
"Too holy. And did you see that shitty hair? Man!"
"Too nerd for you, guy. You deserve better."

And did Person #1 believe?
I don't know.
He just uttered, LOL.

I think I'm going to cry now
I don't think I want to meet him anymore.
I'm too damn ugly for his friends
I'm worse off if I see him...right?

&I'm going off to cry.

4:33 오후

` 530; -

"When you're in primary school, it doesn't matter if you study or don't, you ace. When you're in secondary school, regardless of whether you study or don't, you fail fucking badly like shit." - Chandhini

So true, so true.


School was /bearable/, at the very least. I hate Physics teachers who -somehow- has a fetish with you and your seating partner, and calls both of you up, or, comes up to your side of the lab desk to "inspect" your class work. BLEAGH, PLEASE NOT LET IT BE WHAT I THINK IT IS.

Time flies while we're having fun, again. It's like, March, and just a few weeks ago, I hated 3E6 and all it's fine ways. Now I am used to Chun Fai's nagging at me to do math.

Got back report cards today. I got a bloody 29 for L1R5. If God doesn't murder me, I will. It's the WORST I ever got in my entire history of schooling. Oh, joy.

Other than practicing piano, doing theory, doing chem+bio+history+socialstudies+physics notes and shoving Florida's Natural Fruit Juice Nuggets in Blueberry down my throat, I am perfectly fine. REALLY.

And I gotta go for piano + theory now, so seeya later darlings.

라벨: , ,

월요일, 3월 05, 2007, 6:57 오후

` 529; -

Well, this is all I have to say now.

B to the I to the T-C-H.

*rants and tears hair out*


No, I am not seeing anyone, I didn't bitch, I didn't pull someone's arse, I didn't rip someone's hair out and make it into a bloody mess.
So can you stop your childishness and have this jiiemuiix shit. I didn't even talk to you, didn't even do anything to you to make you despise me so much.

And I have something to say to you.
Don't think that I'm nice to you and you can treat me like something worse than dirt. I have put up with you for very long, and I can't stand your attitude. When I say hello, at least have the decent courtesy that your parents tried to instill in you to reply back, bitch.

I was just telling you nicely not to speak to people in a certain way, and you thought I was scolding you. And, what's more, said that I am "act rich", "proud", "not even dep head still want to scold me lor."

You're either thick skinned or dense in the head, bitch.


2 more days (:

라벨: , ,

일요일, 3월 04, 2007, 8:36 오후

` 528; - ass rubbers.

Before you people get any dirty ideas, this is not what you think, you kinky lot.

Have you ever sat on the corner seat of the MRT, the one next to the glass panel? Yep, I bet you have.

You're just trying to see through the myriad of fingerprints, rolled-up balls of snot and grime, and sweat particles on the glass pane, and, you stop at a station. And someone who owns an ass equivalent to Mrs Norbit's comes up, and squashes said buttock into your face (seperated by a very dirty glass pane), and kneads it on the glass, sighing with contentment.

I feel immense disgust at that, especially that person's kacheng is just right next to my face. It's even more repulsive than you picking up a cockroach and eating it raw (okay, I guess that's even more repulsive).

I am reasonably tall, and the height of that person's buttock is just smack in my face. I prefer that screen to be cleared so I could have a birds eye view of that couple snogging one another at the couple seat on the train, and not someone's dirty arse.

Even worse, I had this incident when this uber horizontally-challenged man came up (dressed in FBTs, nonetheless), and mashes that butt to the glass panel. I was sleeping, with my head leaned against said pane when I awoke due to a pungent smell. The seat of his FBTs were soaked with sweat and when he left the MRT for the next station, there was a buttock print and a faint odour of unwashed underpants on and around the panel respectively.

Gross, if you ask me.

라벨: , ,

토요일, 3월 03, 2007, 12:01 오후

` 527; - Sports Day
It's amazing how 1E3 o5 could still be so united after, 2 years.
photos by TANKIATYIIIIII! (:

Girlfriend, Shihui and I <3

As they say, a picture says a thousand words. (:


금요일, 3월 02, 2007, 9:20 오후

` 526; - such great heights

I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles
In our eyes are mirror images and when
We kiss they're perfectly aligned
And I have to speculate that God himself
Did make us into corresponding shapes like
Puzzle pieces from the clay

And true, it may seem like a stretch, but
It's thoughts like this that catch my troubled head
when you're away when I am missing you to death

When you are out there on the road for
Several weeks of shows and when you scan
The radio, I hope this song will guide you home

They will see us waving from such great
Heights, 'come down now,' they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away
'come down now,' but we'll stay...

I tried my best to leave this all on your
Machine but the persistent beat it sounded
Thin upon listening

And that frankly will not fly. You will hear
The shrillest highs and lowest lows with
The windows down when this is guiding you home

{Such Great Heights; Postal Service}

Had a meeting with the most repulsive specimen of the male species, ever.

For once, he claims that he possesses a girlfriend. But I could tell he was lying.
He is vertically challenged, and has the immaculate fashion sense of a 9 year old.

I remember asking him to go to church with me, and I expected him to wear, like, streetwear. But he appeared in Jimmy-Neutron-like polo tee and berms. The fashion police could arrest him any second and I wouldn't even blink an eye.

And he hung from the metal bars of the MRT, and everyone thought he was my boyfriend. B2 was shocked speechless when I told them that he was, yes, unfortunately, my classmate and he wears long pants in school.


And, furthurmore, he talkss liikee thiis annd iit ishh pissinqq miiee 0rff.
He sends smses to my two very good friends, whom he acknowledges as his "jiiezxzxz".

A specimen of the smses he sent them;

"everyydae ii spendd wiith euu iish anotherr lenqth ii grow cl0serr tuurh euu. tuurh miie, euu are turrh bestt person ii culdd havee g0rtten tuurh n0ee nnd ii wiish turhh embracex euur lurbb ferrevaa."


And he stalks us in class too.
Now he's hanging around Liyana. Liyana, my condolences.

And I have expressed my immense dislike for him.
And guess how he replied.
"turrh Na0mii.
ii havee t0rlerated euur n0nsense lerrhx. ii have triied turrh befriien euu and ii havee cumm tuu thurrh c0nclusii0nn that euu sarkxs"

I replied, in CAPS

Please speak proper, standard English. I do not comprehend Egyptian hieroglyphs.
ps: my name is Naomi, not Na0mii.

I hope he gets the point.


Passion consumes my being like a whirlwind, like a gentle embrace.

Whenever his name pops up, I feel the little twinge of happiness, like when I found the correct word for my essay, I play the whole Grade 8 song on the piano without mistakes, and when I hear the orchestra end a symphony with a flourish.

Anticipation awaits, mon cherie.

라벨: , , , ,

3:35 오후

` 525; - shit happens.

Woke up. Hair in disarray (again).
Went for Sports Day. I was a Urinal (Ur-anus house member) and I migrated to be a Martian.
Crapping with girlfriend and gang made me feel so, damn, happy.


My modesty was almost violated in the Bio lab today by MISS ZHENG KEJUN.
I was sleeping soundly on the lab tables, and Kejun had the audacity to mimic scandalous, if not risque, acts on me.
Thank goodness I managed to wake up in time to see her face centimeters away from mine.
And MISS CHERI NUR AINI didn't even try to stop her, but was laughing away at my situation.



Hello, we're all in this thing together, and, we rushed from wherever we were to school to do the damn thing.
And. You arrived /atrociously/ late, and you didn't even apologise. You messed up the measurements, and after measuring for 3 beakers, you gave up and went to make a phone call, leaving the WHOLE BOTTLE OF MURISHIGI AND SKOOG OPEN.

Naturally, Murishigi and Skoog, when caught with water, will absorb water vapour and form starchy stuff that clings on the inside of the bottle. And, you left it open, and you didn't even finish what we told you to do. Instead, you chatted over the phone and then messed up my PRECIOUS ALUMINIUM FOIL.

And when we told you we were meeting again next week for the measuring of pH, you went, "Oh, we have to meet, depends ON MY MOOD."

The world doesn't revolve around your mood alone.

We painstakingly measured and chopped the fruits and stuff out, and if we win the project, you get all the glory. This is UNFAIR.

It's either you do something constructive now, or we'll kick you out of the list.

*tears hair and screams*

/on a lighter note.../


*hypervendilates and dies*


the pure blood vamp says:
I cut my hair. All my precious HAIR GONE

the pure blood vamp says:
now I look like those army people


the pure blood vamp says:
no la, better than them. I scared that after you see me

the pure blood vamp says:
you will run away and refuse to see me. you tio shock

as if I will. -_________-

stupid guy xD

라벨: , , , ,

목요일, 3월 01, 2007, 8:13 오후

` 524; - i'm so missing you.

Today was blinking horrible. Got scolded by Mr D. Got ignored. Most severely, he hasn't emailed me for 4 whole days.

I miss you, my pure blood vamp (:
I hope he doesn't notice this ;D

He'll be coming back to Singapore next week (or so I heard), and Hinwen and Peggy and Sihui will be in Korea. (How apt, he'll be here while they'll be there haha). I wanna go also but I hope I could get his number soon (:

I think something's wrong with Remy.
Peggy says that Hinwen accidentally told them that I liked him, and Remy got depressed.
I have this nagging feeling that Remy... you know.
I don't know la.
He's creeping me out with that supposedly "come hither" look.

MEP was the sex with Hinwen, Peggy, Remy and Alastair.

Hinwen and I needed to go to the toilet (especially ME), and all the loos in CHIJ were locked. And we wandered aimlessly around the primary compound and saw this board:

"Find Your Way."

How apt. It was for some career guidance thingy and Hinwen guffawed loudly.
Managed to complete private business in some clean loo.

Chatted about HIM and how he /supposedly/ likes me. Oh rapture. Remy is such a killjoy. He doesn't like HJ. I shall behead him when the time comes.

"I'm scared that my teacher calls up my mom and tell her. Then I could not be a Councillor anymore."

"Please. It's minor, and you've not done anything major, I deduce. And, it's not like you're having sex at the water coolers or something."

"I'll get EXPELLED, not suspended."


We had this "hot" dude who was teaching Superteens today. Renie, Jannah, Cheryl and Liyana were ogling at him through the crack in the window. Gosh.
Crapped with Renie and stuff.


and I miss you so, damn, much. <3